Objectives of the trimester met?

During the start of the trimester, I set for myself two objectives which I hope to achieve at the end of the course. I wanted to better understand my peers effectively by assessing their written, verbal, non-verbal or visual communication. I also wanted to improve how I channeled my feelings and thoughts with better communication skills.

Instead of paying too much attention to the words that are being said, I realized that much of communication is based on the tone of voice and body language. It is commonly known that good communication is the foundation of any successful relationship, whether it be personal or professional. It is important to recognize that our nonverbal communication which consists of our facial expressions, gestures, eye contact, posture, and tone of voice, can give us clues and additional information and meaning in addition to verbal communication.

Using the emotional energy matrix, I can better understand a person’s non-verbal cues by identifying which zone the person is in. By understanding the nature of emotional energy matrix, it provides me with guidance on how to better manage it. Therefore, I have fully achieved my first objective combined with a greater appreciation of verbal and non-verbal communication.

Adapting Danial Goleman Emotional Intelligence management strategy into my life has empowered me with the ability to identify my own emotions and the emotions of others, achieving the second objective. Personally, with this management strategy, I am now able to manage my own emotions effectively knowing that it has the capacity to impact people around me both positively and negatively.

With other various communication strategies, such as the six seconds EQ model, being taught throughout the trimester, it molded me into a better effective communicator. Being a better effective communicator allows me to stop and think and analyze the situation before speaking.  Even when speaking I must manage my non-verbal cues to prevent misunderstandings.

Group members conflict.

I am currently working on an engineering group project with 3 other members. As we are all very vocal and aggressive in our proposed ideas, at times we can get into heated debates during discussions on how the work should be executed as we lock horns to prove and persuade everyone about our ideas. On this fateful occasion, the discussion escalated into a major conflict between Hiro and Tina.

That day, we were sitting in a room around a discussion table. Hiro was uncharacteristically throwing in more ideas than he usually would during any discussion. On this discussion, my group mates and I were actively listening to Hiro’s ideas by noting down the key points he addressed while simultaneously nodding and maintaining eye contact with him. Tina, on the other hand, was extremely restless when Hiro was speaking. Her display of non-verbal gesture suggested that she was not in the least interested in what Hiro was saying. Instead of paying good attention, she was continuously fidgeting and shaking her left leg and was especially distracted by her phone.

Eventually, I noticed Hiro was annoyed by her. He had his eyebrows squeezed together forming a crease, and his eyelids were tight and straight. His head was slightly lowered as his eyes looked through his lowered brow whenever he got distracted by Tina. Hiro finally could not take it anymore and confronted Tina about her behavior. He asked Tina why she wasn’t giving her fullest attention and that she was a major distraction to the group. With bloodshot eyes, Tina immediately responded by flashing her index finger at Hiro and viciously shouted at him to mind his own business. Afterward, they broke out into a fierce argument.

On one side of the argument, Hiro expressed his displeasure and unhappiness towards Tina’s rudeness and inability to focus during the discussion and suggested she leave. On the other side of the argument, Tina defended herself by explaining to Hiro that her behavior was the result of “problems” she was facing and that it had nothing to do with the group and its members.

In the end, Hiro submitted himself and agreed to whatever Tina was saying. Although tensions were still high, he carried on with the discussion ignoring Tina and focusing his attention on me and the other group members. Poor Tina was left alone as she sobbed cross-legged in a corner with her phone. My other group member and I did not want to get involved in the ongoing conflict so we pretended as though nothing had happened.

What should Hiro or Tina have done or said to prevent the conflict from occurring?

NO to gender discrimination (Revised)

I observed an interesting interaction between my classmates recently. It involved them being together in a project group from my current university’s class. In this group of four, the only female was the group leader with the remaining three guys as group members. They were having a group discussion on an engineering project that was due in two weeks’ time.

Before the discussion began, I noticed each of their facial expressions, except for the leader. They seem really uninterested and reluctant to start the discussion. Two of them were pre-occupied with their mobile phones while the other had his head resting on the table. I was unsure if their restless behavior was a result of a long day at school or if they were just being disrespectful towards their leader. Whatever the reason, I was extremely upset with their way of behaving because they had no regards for the feelings of others. Perhaps it is in the culture of young men to behave in such an ill-mannered manner where, unless they receive instructions on what is required to be done, they will not make an effort to start on a task.

Next, the group leader began updating the group on its progress. Externally, it looks as if her group members were listening to what she had to say but judging from their body language, it looked contradictory. Each of them to my knowledge displayed negative body language which showed how they each felt about the current situation. One had his arms crossed over his chest, another had his legs crossed over other while the last member had his legs stretched on another chair. Instead of remaining still and giving their utmost attention to their group leader, they kept fidgeting and seemed uneasy. These could be possibly due to an influenced culture where age acts as an important role. As long as we are older than anyone, we assume we deserve respect from individuals younger than us and expect them to endure and not feel annoyed from any sorts of unpleasant behaviors portrayed by us.

These negative non-verbal cues could also be the result of the difference in gender or in other words, gender discrimination. In the context of gender role, most of us feel that girls are not good leaders or should not even carry that role for that matter. Most of us see males as being leaders and females as followers. However, this is just a belief, not a known fact. These may be possible reasons why the group members showed such negative behavior towards the group leader. For the same reason, I feel that was how the three male members of the group were feeling as well. In addition, the group leader did not disapprove or express her thoughts of their absurd behavior. As a result, it most probably further reinforced their beliefs that girls are not good leaders.

Effective Communication (Revised)

Strengths and challenges in communicating

Communication strengths consist of written and verbal communications which include the ability to listen and speak. Communication strengths differ depending on the types of communications. Verbal communication strengths include the ability to persuade and negotiate when we are able to deliver a speech concisely without complicating any sentences and not offending the listener in any way. It also includes the ability to give and receive constructive criticism amicably. Written communication skills include the abilities to write clearly and concisely.

Miscommunication is the most common challenge in communication skills when the reader or listener fails to understand what is written or said.  Miscommunication happens mainly because our expectations, as when we communicate and the responses received do not match our expectations, may lead to frustration. For example, when working on a project as a group, the leader gives out tasks to each individual to their own jobs and some are unsure of what they are required to do. Some members of the team look to clarify their roles, while other members assume that they know what is expected of them and proceed with their jobs.

Another reason is the channel of delivering the message.  Body language, verbal and written skills do not fully depict our experiences and our images as such we are only truly communicating a portion of what we actually intend to say.

The third reason why miscommunication occurs is because of our internal filters. When the message is conveyed, it is left to the readers’ and listeners’ own interpretations, which can vary. For example, when reading a story or watching a movie, the images conjured and emotions felt within us are based on our own understanding of the words and knowledge of the definitions.

2 objectives you would want to achieve in the course

There are two main objectives I seek to achieve in the course. The first one is, I aim to better understand my peers through better means of communication be it through written, verbal, nonverbal or visual communication. The second objective is I would like to improve myself as someone who is able to channel his feelings and thoughts regarding something through clearer communication skills. In order to do so, I have to be an active listener and understand the types of constraints and skills of communication so that I can improve the interaction and relationship with my peers.

Hello com150

I feel developing effective communication skills is important as it helps us understand and associate with the people around us. Whenever there’s a misunderstanding the best method to resolve the situation is to communicate with one another. Effective communication also helps build mutual respect, and sharing of ideas, be it a good or bad one, and showing affection amongst one another. In order to develop effective communication skills, I must first understand, during the lessons, what exactly forms effective communication. So, I will be listening actively before I start to apply what I will be learning in this course. I must also be interactive in class whenever my teacher asks the class to do activities. I am very fascinated on the types of communication skills I will obtain at the end of the course.